Colonel Schaeffer’s Last Chancers – “Demolition Man” and “Animal”

Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Demolition Man" and "Animal"

Today’s post features my final model from June as well as one of my early completions from July. After my little rant as part of my previous Last Chancers post, it’s good to see that there’s nothing here that could possibly offend any… oh.

Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Demolition Man" and "Animal"

I kind-of jest here. “Demolition Man” is obviously partly-based on some Russian and Soviet stereotypes, but there’s a little more to it than that. While his headgear is a Ushanka, (as also worn by the Valhallan Guard), and his Lasgun has a long, sickle-style magazine, reminiscent of Kalashnakov rifles, the cut and style of his pants look to be based on Cossack pants, so he’s really much more of a 40k-style composite of tropes and elements – kind of like the Space Wolves who are Scots-Irish Viking Celts covered in Wolfskins. Still, I went with those feels and painted his lasgun in the orangey-plastic colours of the “traditional” AK, and the fine lines on his shirt to turn it into a telnyashka – though in my research it turns out that a lot of other countries in the Post-Soviet region wore in their militaries as well.

Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Demolition Man" and "Animal"

“Animal” has much more of a Pentinent Legion feel to his sculpt, though I’m not sure why you’d gove someone like that a chainsword and a meltagun. The chainsword looks way oversized, and that’s because the sculptor appears to have simply slapped a plastic Astartes chainsword onto the green’s back – and did the same with the Auspex scanner tucked under his right arm, resulting in his gear looking comically oversized, which is a key reason I painted them dark – to make them a little more understated than if I’d painted them in bright ’90’s yellow – as was one of my first thoughts. Since Animal also has that (explosive) collar, I decided to paint his pants in a “prison orange” which again serves to draw the eye away (at least a little) from his Space Marine-sized accessories. I also gave his melta-barrel the old heat treatment by putting it onto the stovetop until it discoloured. Possibly.

Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Demolition Man" and "Animal"

The reason Animal wasn’t completed for June was because I wanted to add some serious tribal tattooing to him – in the style of the late 1990’s and early 2000’s. It just seemed to fit, but then when I got ill, painting those fine details just wasn’t going to happen. I also wanted to continue with the subtle variations of skin tones that I started with Warrior Woman and continued with on Brains and Shiv, so I went a little more ruddy with Animal using my old hex-pot-era Citadel Dwarf Flesh, to give him a more sunburned look. It’s really become apparent at this point that attempting to paint in the whites and pupils of these models’ eyes is a fool’s errand, as most of them have only sculpted slits for their eyes rather than the more usual sculpted eyeballs. They do have some nice eyelids, to be fair, and the models still work very well.

I’ve really been enjoying the painting of these models quite a bit, as their status as (now-classic?) unique characterfully-individual sculpts really lends them to taking more time than I would with mass-army models.

Colonel Schaeffer’s Last Chancers – “Brains” and “Shiv”

Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Brains" and "Shiv"

After really quite enjoying the process of plucking unpainted models out of the tub of unpainted survivors and just getting them from based to completed quickly, I decided I’d like to paint up a couple more of my Imperial Guard Schaeffer’s Last Chancers box that came out way back in 1999. I painted Warrior Woman back in Febuary, and I figure it’d be nice to paint the entire box of models before the end of this year, especially as they’re nice characterful models and would probably work in games like Kill Team, or even Stargrave, etc.

Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Brains" and "Shiv"

So I plucked this pair. For painting reference, I checked out the official box art to see what GW had done, and then took liberties from there. Shiv’s outfit seemed fine enough, so I didn’t deviate a whole lot, though I wanted to give his skin a pale, somewhat sickly pallor – because, you know, just look at him! It hasn’t come out all that well in the photos, unfortunately, but it’s there.

Shiv, on the other hand clearly has a Native American inspiration, given his outfit and the box art so I went with a more tanned skin tone, though I skipped most of the colourful aspects of the original – figuring that one bracelet was enough colourful bling for an outdoorsy Imperial Guard Regiment

Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Brains" and "Shiv"

Amusingly/Depressingly, while doing my googling to figure out what the names of these models were, I found myself on Reddit where a person who identified themselves as Native American who wrote about how he likes this model since he felt it was clear representation for his culture was roundly put in his place by some (presumably white guy) who told him in no uncertain terms that the model is an unacceptable and offensive caricature. (following that guy, I found he also posts on /sigmarxism, so there ya go…) I mean, there’s your white entitlement – having the arrogance and gall to tell other people how they should think about their own representation… and I’m a “fucking leftie”. Just one with a brain and an understanding of irony and nuance…

So anyway, I’m not going to speak for anyone but myself, but this model seems pretty tame, as really only the hair and fringes/tassels potentially mark him as descended from any particular culture. He’s not wearing a long feathered headdress or sculpted in a “war dance” pose, and the headband has cultural overtones while also being pretty IG-generic over the years. Aside from the whole “Dirty Dozen” thing, I think the model’s sculpt was most influenced by the Perry Twins’ love of History and Historical miniatures – something that became even more apparent since then with some other LC models I’m still painting…
Colonel Schaeffer's Last Chancers - "Brains" and "Shiv"

Anyway, people on the internet being offended by everything aside, this was really an enjoyable pair of models to pluck out of the leadpile and work on from start to finish – a nice break from all the Zombicide Survivors, but also models that I would not have just grabbed to paint if I wasn’t on such a roll of getting interesting and different models painted due to those same Zombicide models.